Remember that guy who I said i liked and that liked me back? Well, he just sent me a relationship request on facebook. I knew that if i accepted then people would bombard me with questions and say "congratulations" and all that. But I accepted it. And now I'm getting nervous and confused. Even though its just facebook, I still don't think I should have done that. I mean, I still have fifty million thoughts running through my mind about other things. And I know that when you really like someone, they're all you think about. (I think) I think that all I have/ had for him is just a crush and nothing more. Or maybe the fact that I have so much crap on my mind is smothering the feelings I have for him. I don't want to tell him that I think it was just a crush and nothing more, hurt his feelings, have more time later on in the year, find out that I DO really like him as more than just as crush and then turn into a freakin' pin ball again going bk and forth with this and lose whatever chance I have with him.

-takes a breath-

I've never been in love before or really truly had deep feelings for a guy, idk what to think. And I feel like I can't just take a moment to think about it b/c i have so much stuff to do. Like right now, I have to read 30 text book pages and take notes and then do a worksheet...-sighs- Man, this is such a bad time. I feel like I've put my feelings on ice for so long and now they're not going to thaw. I never wanted to worry about this but once again, I have no choice b/c there are so many things in my life that need to be addressed. I can barely even maintain good relationships with my friends anymore so how can i be expected to be in a relationship with a guy? And then this is bringing back my sexuality confusion. Because I've had feelings for my gender before but I didn't want to have to deal with that. I've told myself that I don't have to b/c I'm not the only person who goes through this and its perfectly normal. I mean I find guys attractive and stuff but maybe that's just it.

O.O whoa that's a lot, right?



Man, I seriously need some advice...